MARRIAGE: AS A RELATIONSHIP
It is probably true to say that with a few exceptions any marriage has the potential to be good. How marriage actually works out for any one couple is probably not so much governed by circumstances (which is what most couples believe) but by lessons learned in childhood and applied later. For example, a fear of the opposite sex, no matter how unconscious, can be learned early in life from indifferent or hostile parents or brothers and sisters of the opposite sex. Quite often a dominant, critical and punitive mother who wants (unconsciously) to take revenge on men generally for distress suffered in her own childhood brings up a son to be afraid of women. His male ego may be weak but he compensates by bullying his wife. She may even have been attracted to him in the first place by his ‘masterful’ personality without realising that it was really a disguise for weakness. By the time she finds out the truth the marriage is often on the rocks. Such a man dare not give in to a woman because in doing so he sees himself as being submissive to his mother. Such men often batter their wives.
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